AUGUSTEN BURROUGHS

A collection of autobiographical short stories, small vignettes of his life experiences, universal in their appeal yet unabashedly intimate and very funny.From the #1 bestselling author of Running with Scissors and Dry comes a contagiously funny, heartwarming, shocking, twisted, and absolutely magical collection. True stories that give voice to the thoughts we all have but dare not mention. It begins with a Tang Instant Breakfast Drink television commercial when Augusten was seven. Then there is the contest of wills with the deranged cleaning lady. The execution of a rodent carried out with military precision and utter horror. Telemarketing revenge. Dating an undertaker and much more. A collection of true stories that are universal in their appeal yet unabashedly intimate and very funny.

From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Running with Scissors comes Augusten Burroughss most provocative collection of true stories yet. From nicotine gum addiction to lesbian personal ads to incontinent dogs, Possible Side Effects mines Burroughss life in a series of uproariously funny essays. These are stories that are uniquely Augusten, with all the over-the-top hilarity of Running with Scissors,the erudition of Dry, and the breadth of Magical Thinking. A collection that is universal in its appeal and unabashedly intimate, Possible Side Effects continues to explore that which is most personal, mirthful, disturbing, and cherished, with unmatched audacity. A cautionary tale in essay form. Be forewarned--hilarious, troubling, and shocking results might occur.

From the #1 bestselling author of Running with Scissors and Dry comes a A wonderfully twisted collection of true Christmas stories.Of course youve eaten too much chocolate at Christmas, but have you ever eaten the face off a six-foot-stuffed Santa? Youve seen gingerbread houses, but have you ever made your own gingerbread block of flats? Youve woken up with a hangover, but have you ever woken up lying next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection of true stories, he recounts Christmases past and present - as only he can.With gimlet-eyed wit, Augusten Burroughs shows how Christmas can bring out the worst in us and sometimes - just sometimes - the very, very best.

From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Running with Scissors comes Augusten Burroughss most provocative memoir. Outrageously fuinny and scorchingly honest.You may not know it, but youve met Augusten Burroughs. Youve seen him on the street, in bars, on the underground, at restaurants: a twenty-something guy, nice suit, works in advertising. Regular. Ordinary. But when the ordinary person had two drinks, Augusten had twelve; when the ordinary person went home at midnight, Augusten never went home at all. At the request (well, it wasnt really a request) of his employers, Augusten lands in rehab, where his dreams of group therapy with Robert Downey Jr are dashed by the grim reality of fluorescent lighting and paper hospital slippers. But when Augusten is forced to examine himself, thats when he finds himself in the worst trouble of all. Because when his thirty days are up, he has to return to his same drunken life - and live it sober.

The hilarious first novel by the #1 bestselling author of Running with Scissors, Dry, A Wolf at the Table, and You Better Not Cry, Sellevision is Augusten Burroughs darkly funny and vastly entertaining skewering of a very troubled home-shopping channel.Welcome to the world of Sellevision, premier retail broadcasting network. When Max Andrews, the much loved and handsome (that is, lonely and gay) host of a "Toys for Tots" segment, accidentally exposes himself in front of millions of kids, Sellevision faces its first big scandal. As Max struggles to find a new job in television, the popular and perky host Peggy Jean Smythe is receiving sinister emails from a stalker. Popping pills and drinking heavily, she fails to notice that her husband is spending a lot of time with the young babysitter who lives next door. Then theres Leigh, whose affair with married Sellevision boss Howard Toast is going nowhere until she announces their relationship on air. A blistering satire of our overcharged, scandal-obsessed world, Sellevision is "an absolute howl . . . wicked fun" (New York Daily News)

En "A wolf at the Table", la precuela de su bestseller "Running with Scissors", Augusten Burrought recrea la aterradora relación entre un padre sociópata y un hijo necesitado de su amor incondicional. Emocionalmente firme y valiente, esta devastadora novela se centra en la abismal distancia que puede separar a padres e hijos.

Of course you've eaten too much chocolate at Christmas, but have you ever eaten the face off a six-foot-stuffed Santa? You've seen gingerbread houses, but have you ever made your own gingerbread block of flats? You've woken up with a hangover, but have you ever woken up lying next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection of true stories, he recounts Christmases past and present - as only he can. With gimlet-eyed wit, Augusten Burroughs shows how Christmas can bring out the worst in us and sometimes - just sometimes - the very, very best.

With unconventional wit and a wonderfully weird way of looking at things, Burroughs, author of "Running with Scissors, " chronicles his life on the edge after leaving his deeply eccentric foster family. "Dry" is at times howlingly funny, devastatingly moving and, in the end, uplifting.

A wonderfully twisted collection of true Christmas stories from the author of "Running with Scissors". Of course you've eaten too much chocolate at Christmas...but have you ever eaten the face off a six-foot-stuffed Santa? You've seen gingerbread houses...but have you ever made your own gingerbread tenement? You've woken up with a hangover...but have you ever woken up next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection, he recounts Christmases past and present - as only he can. With gimlet-eyed wit and illuminated prose, Augusten shows how the holidays bring out the worst in us and sometimes, just sometimes, the very, very best.

This book is approved for consumption by those seeking pleasure, escape, amusement, enlightenment, or general distraction. This book is not approved to treat disorders such as eBay addiction or incessant blind dating. Doll collectors may experience special sensitivity, as may discourteous drivers, candy-company brand managers, and nicotine-gum users. Do not operate heavy machinery while reading this book, until you know what possible side effects it may have on you.

"OUTRAGEOUSLY AMUSING." --Entertainment Weekly "COMPELLING." --USA Today "BREATHTAKING." --Tampa Tribune THINK YOUR CHILDHOOD WAS WEIRD? ENTER THIS TWELVE-YEAR-OLD'S WACKY WORLD… RUNNING WITH SCISSORS is the true story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of Anne Sexton) gave him away to be raised by her unorthodox psychiatrist who bore a striking resemblance to Santa Claus. So at the age of twelve, Burroughs found himself amidst Victorian squalor living with the doctor's bizarre family, and befriending a pedophile who resided in the backyard shed. The story of an outlaw childhood where rules were unheard of, and the Christmas tree stayed up all year-round, where Valium was consumed like candy, and if things got dull, an electroshock therapy machine could provide entertainment. The funny, harrowing, and bestselling account of an ordinary boy's survival under the most extraordinary circumstances…

This is the story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of grandeur) gave him away to be raised by her psychiatrist, a dead ringer for Santa Claus and a certifiable lunatic into the bargain. Suddenly at the age of 12, Augusten found himself living in a dilapidated Victorian house in perfect squalor. The doctor's bizarre family, a few patients and a paedophile living in the garden shed completed the tableau. Here, there were no rules or school. The Christmas tree stayed up until Summer and valium was chomped down like sweets. When things got a bit slow, there was always the ancient electroshock therapy machine under the stairs.

Running with Scissors is the true story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of Anne Sexton) gave him away to be raised by her unorthodox psychiatrist who bore a striking resemblance to Santa Claus. So at the age of twelve, Burroughs found himself amidst Victorian squalor living with the doctor's bizarre family, and befriending a pedophile who resided in the backyard shed. The story of an outlaw childhood where rules were unheard of, and the Christmas tree stayed up all year round, where Valium was consumed like candy, and if things got dull an electroshock- therapy machine could provide entertainment. The funny, harrowing and bestselling account of an ordinary boy's survival under the most extraordinary circumstances.

Augusten, el chico de Recortes de mi vida, al que su maídre abandonó en cuerpo y psique en manos del doctor Finch y de su excentrica familia extensa, ha sobrevivido a su esperpentica adolescencia. Ahora tiene veinticuatro años, vive en Nueva York, es un brillante redactor publiicitario y, al parecer, un veinteañero como muchos. Solo que en el tiempo en que sus amigos se toman dos whisikies, el se bebe doce. Es uno de esos alcoholicos que beiben un litro de whisky por la noche pero al dia siguiente consiguen funcionar. Hasta que la bebida comienza a notarse en su trabajo, y la directora de arte no le perdoina que una noche llamara a un cliente y le propusiera hacer sexo por telefono. La empresa decide pagarle la cliinica de rehabilitacion que el elija. Y Augusten opta por la mas cutre de las clinicas cutres para alcoholicos gays. "Burroughs puede escribir sobre el amor sin ser almibairado, cuenta su vida como alcoholico sin aburrirnos jaimas, y escribe sobre su demencial familia sin compadeicerse a si mismo" (Deirdre Donahue, USA Today).